When words escape us … Pauses 🐾🐾 podcast and prepping!
Hello! Welcome to “When Words Escape Us” where we explore therapeutic touch and compassionate approaches for people living with dementia and their supporters.
Peppering space with the Language of Love
“That goes back to how we are in a space. Not talking over a person …. talking with a person and peppering that space with the language of love … or we can choose the language of being dismissive, you don’t matter … but we bring it back to: you matter.”
Earlier this year I was invited by Gretchen Pop, The Sustainable Bodyworker, to join her on her podcast.
What a joyful hour we spent together covering so much ground, not just about massage for people living with dementia which always includes something on that sticky topic, consent, but also about the importance of reflective practice, community support and self-care for anyone working with vulnerable people.
I loved Gretchen’s curiousity and yes she does ask some difficult questions but it was always about bringing things back to working with presence, and honouring the person we’re supporting whatever profession we’re in. Why it’s important to top ourselves up to continue to be able to do the work we love. We natter about creating a context of safety and in turn how exercising curiousity with our client or loved one can help meet their needs on their terms especially when we take time out to reflect.
Massage Warehouse featured the episode in their newsletter stating, “If you’ve ever wondered how to show up for clients when you’re scraping the bottom of your own energy barrel, this episode’s going to hit home. Nicolle Mitchell opens up about what actually shifts the quality of care for people living with dementia – not just fancy hands-on techniques, but the real, relational groundwork”
You can listen to our heartwarming conversation here:
https://sustainablebodyworker.podbean.com/e/episode-37/
Transitions
As an adoptive mum, I learned that my child who had been through early life complex trauma really struggled with transitions. It’s no surprise when we consider many early life transitions involved further traumatisation, e.g. from birth family to foster carers who sadly also added to that trauma, and finally to us, who as humans sprinkled our dose of stress in for good measure and probably gave our child quite the culture shock. After all, I think most parents are winging it.
Similarly, transitional trauma can occur when people with dementia find themselves in a care system that doesn’t always do right by them. Even residences with the best of reputations may unintentionally traumatise a person who is disorientated without meaning to. I think it’s fair to say that most people who enter the care system end up being traumatised by the transition.
It stands to reason therefore, that a person may communicate their distress by their behaviour or verbalisations. Transitions therefore can be very tricky and a person may need extra support. We need to be aware of this and respond accordingly.
Drawing a comparison again, my child used to find changing schools or class difficult. They also found it hard even to change activities, so as a therapeutic parent I discovered ways to help soften the transition, co-regulate, and sometimes I used touch to help with that process.
I think that without infantilising a person, we can validate, exercise curiousity and use co-regulation skills such as touch and empathy to attune with a person, join them on their mission and meet their needs, which ultimately are about connection and feeling that we matter.
Join me in Nicolle’s Reflections in coming weeks to explore this topic further. You can listen here:
https://www.youtube.com/@nicollemitchell6114
Pause
I’ve a spent a lot of time in the past few days taking a pause as I’ve had a grotty head cold. This has meant cancelling all face to face work. However, as my symptoms have improved and the boredom set in, I set to pulling together my presentation “Rediscovering Touch in Dementia Care” ready for this year’s Cornwall Dementia Conference hosted by Kernow Health CIC. It’s just about ready, and I’m looking forward to sharing my thoughts and having a play with attendees who are game!
The event is prior to Dementia Action Week where the theme this year is all about people’s stories. I’ll be letting you in a little bit to part of Jame’s story and I’ll be encouraging participants on the day to action one thing to change course. Sometimes we can get a bit stuck in our ways, especially within cultures so I’ve some suggestions to help bring presence, “being” and touch into the workplace with ease.
If you’re coming, I look forward to seeing you there. I’ll be there all day, so do come up and say hello. I’d love to have a chat with you about my passion (either that or just start talking about growing and I’ll be hard to get back in the room!) 😆
Training
The next course coming up in May is my annual exclusive advanced 2 day course especially for qualified bodyworkers who are serious about deepening their knowledge and specialising in treating people living with dementia.
After that, my next 1 day course which gives you all the basic fundamentals so your service can become more inclusive and get you going with confidence, is in Morecambe at The 4 Elements Company. I’m looking forward to running my course there for the fist time as well as hopping on to Scotland afterwards for a family visit.
Remember if you can’t make group training or prefer 1 to 1 training, give me a shout and we’ll work out something to suit you:
-1 to 1 training in Cornwall at a mutually agreeable time – cost £350 per day
-Bespoke organisational training days, e.g. NHS, Adult Social Care, Voluntary Organisations – POA
-Your EMPOWER Hour – online consultations to help you build confidence in your practice £75/hour
Courses – Massage for Dementia
Churrah for now …
Well, that’s me for now.
Remember to rest up when you need to and pause to enjoy the beauty of spring. It’ll be summer before we know it.
Warmest wishes to you, Nicolle 🧡
“When words escape us, touch says it all.”
#massagefordementia #MeetMeWhereIAm